Fruits Basket: Tainted Souls

Tohru's POV:


I will never understand why I let some things become so bad. I guess that's just the way I am. I let go things that I shouldn't.

When I first noticed the comments and the looks, I just disregarded them. At first, it wasn't anything to be worried about. Not even a little bit. It was normal for them to feel the way they did, and so they didn't like me, of course. I just don't know what I did wrong.

It all started when I received that first dirty look. Even before I was hanging out with Yuki, they would get on my case a little. Uo and Hana would take care of that right away, though. But after I met Yuki, and the rest of the Sohmas, their hatred grew.

Mom told me once that it was natural for someone to feel hatred against another being. But it became wrong once someone acted upon it in a negative way. Mom taught me that no one was truly evil; they had some trace of good in them somewhere. It just took the right person to bring it out.
She knew first hand, since her parents weren't very nice, and she once belonged to an aggressive
gang. I tried to look at my situation in that way; that everyone has a good side to them.

But, it graduated from dirty looks to minor physical retaliation. They would push me in the halls when I would walk by. Just a small shove; it would make me stumble a little bit, but nothing really bad. And after, they would smirk or call me a rude name. But, I just shook it off, even though some of those names would hurt a bit.

Then, they started to smack the books and papers out of my hands. And they would kick them around, snickering. That's when it started to really bother me. No one would help me pick up my things from the ground, but that didn't really matter; it wasn't any of their business. And of course I did not tell Yuki, Kyo or Shigure. I couldn't. I didn't even tell Uo or Hana. It wasn't any use to get them involved. I wouldn't want anything bad to come of it.

One day, when the Prince Yuki Fan Club girls once more knocked the items out of my grasp, I knelt down to pick them up, and was greeted by a boot to my nose. The pain shot through my face like a bullet, but my nose was mostly numb. It was the shock that hurt it more. My hand flew up to my nose, and I whimpered slightly. The girls just walked away, laughing.

When I took my hand away from my nose, I saw blood in my palm. That scared me. I felt my nose, and it didn't seem broken, so I was sort of relieved. Wiping my nose and sniffling (from the blood more than tears), I picked my books and papers up, and who should come along but Momiji Sohma.

"TOHRU! HI!" He giggled, skipping toward me. I was so glad to see him. He jumped and grabbed my arm, making me stumble a little.

"Tohru! Hey, how are you? How's school going?" he started asking. I smiled and chuckled. I was so happy I could've hugged him. But I stopped myself before I acted. It wouldn't be great for the Sohmas if he had transformed into a rabbit right there in the hallway.

Momiji's bright smile was replaced by a worried frown when he saw my face.

"Oh, Tohru, what happened?! You're nose is bleeding…a lot!"

My heart flipped. I didn't want to tell Momiji about what happened; he'd probably tell someone else. And besides, I didn't want him to be concerned either.

"Oh, that? Well…you see…my nose was sort of…uhh, dry earlier, a-and I sneezed…and that's when m-my nose started…bleeding…" I mildly panicked, covering my nose with my hand yet again. Momiji stared into my eyes and I prayed that he would drop the subject. He smiled slightly and stated, "Oh, well, you should go get cleaned up."

"Oh, right. Well, nice seeing you, Momiji" I called over my shoulder as I walked away to the girls' bathroom. Once inside, I grabbed a paper towel, wet it in the sink, and wiped the fresh blood and red crust from underneath my nose. I then took a new paper towel and pinched the bridge of my nose, and leaned forward into the sink.

When the bleeding stopped, I took a third paper towel, dampened it, and once more dabbed under my nostrils. I threw the towels away and walked out of the W.C. And as I traveled to class, I gave the incident a little thought. I will admit that it was frightening, the way they were picking on me; it was getting more violent. But I sighed, and tried to think of more positive things as I shuffled to class.

"Miss Honda" Yuki came up to me after school, "Momiji told me that you had a bloody nose today"

I laughed nervously. It was hard to keep anything secret with Momiji; it made me happier that I didn't tell him about the girls.

"I…uhh yeah I did…b-but it's all okay now! No more bloody nose!" I laughed, pointing to my nose, trying to hide my fear. I'm not sure if he bought it though. I prayed that the abuse would end with the confrontation in the hallway. That way I wouldn't hide anything from my family. I wished they would just leave me alone.

They didn't.

The kicking wasn't the end. Their shoves got rougher. And the insults grew more hurtful. They just wouldn't leave me alone. Those Prince Yuki Fan Club girls had imprisoned me in fear; I never felt safe and couldn't think about anything other than when they would attack next.

"Yo Tohru" Uo asked me one day, "What's wrong? You seem jumpier than usual."

"Yes" Hana replied, her monotone voice chilling the air around her. "Something's not right with you lately."

I gulped, worried that I was giving myself away. It was true; every time someone went to talk to me, or when I would get tapped on the back, I yelped and jumped, or seemed wary before I realized who it was. And now, they were starting to notice. I took a deep breath to contain myself. I wanted nothing more than to pour out all my worries to my friends. I wanted the comfort from them and the reassurance I was safe. But, I didn't want anyone to get hurt in the process of all this, so I kept my mouth shut.

"I-I'm fine, you guys. I…I'm just overwhelmed with school and work. I'll be fine; don't worry about it." I waved my hand dismissively. Uo and Hana looked at each other, unsure if they should believe me, but finally let it slide.

"I thought you were fine with work. And I didn't realize that school was getting to be a problem" Uo admitted. I giggled anxiously, and replied, "Well, you know, at work, they…they were just giving me little extra odd jobs here and there…but it's almost all set!" I was losing my cool; I was panicking. I just prayed that they wouldn't notice. Uo just shrugged while Hana blinked. And that was the end of that conversation.

Then, as if things couldn't get worse, I opened my locker one day to find a Post-it stuck to the inside of the locker door. I was ready to throw up from anxiety when I read what it said.

In big bold letters, it screamed, "STOP IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU"

Now, I was afraid for my life. I never imagined it would get to be this bad. Now more than ever, I wanted to report this to the principal, and Lord knows why I didn't, but my mind kept screaming NO.

But it wasn't just one note.

I received more.

The next more scary than the last.

"WE'LL GET YOU"

"WATCH YOUR BACK"

"WE ARE WATCHING YOU"

"BACK OFF OR DIE"

I could go on. My mind screamed at me to get help. To confide in someone or something. I needed help. Every time I saw one of those girls or even thought about the situation, my eyes would get misty. My common sense started to win; that's when I made the decision to talk to the principal of my school.

I started shaking while walking down the halls, nervous as hell. I took a couple of deep breaths but started wringing my hands. My nerve was slipping as I heard my echoing footsteps down the quiet hallway. I noticed the office as I approached closer. My hands were red from rubbing them so hard.

My mind commanded my body to stop just outside the door to the principal's main office. I inhaled again, and exhaled a shudder. My eyes were nearly blurred from tears. My shaky hand reached for the doorknob. Almost there…just a little farther…to safety…

The door swung open so suddenly, that I didn't even know I got whacked in the face until I was on the ground. I winced when I felt the throbbing on my forehead. I heard a voice exclaiming, "Oh my god! I am so sorry!"

I kept my eyes closed, afraid I would burst out in tears. Someone had grabbed my hand and was pulling my up on my feet. I managed to squeeze open my eyes and what I saw made me freeze. A teacher was standing in front of me, looking concerned, but behind him was Motoko Minagawa. The President of the Prince Yuki Fan Club. The one girl that hated me the most. Her eyes dug into me like daggers. I gulped uneasily. I couldn't even hear the teacher ask me if I was all right. At least, not until I snapped back to reality.

"Huh? What?" I glanced anxiously from the teacher to Motoko.

"I…I asked if you were all right. Are you hurt?" he asked. I could feel the red-hot sensation of a bump on my forehead. But glimpsing at Motoko, I was afraid to say anything. The glare she gave me seemed to threaten "Say anything and I'll get you."

"Uh, I'm f-f-fine! Sorry for the inconvenience, I…was j-just…passing by…sorry!"

The teacher looked at me, unconvinced, but nonetheless shrugged and said some farewell phrase to Motoko, who nodded in response. He then turned and disappeared into his office. As soon as the door closed, Motoko turned to me. Her stare burned into me, and pressured me until I uttered, "Uh…hello…"

"Don't say 'hello' to me, you little bitch" She pushed me against the wall, and pinned my shoulder. For someone that wasn't in athletics, she was pretty strong.

"Now, you listen here and listen good; you better watch yourself. One more step out of line and we'll get you."

"But, I…I don't understand-"

"Well, maybe this will make you understand." And before I knew it, Motoko's fist collided with my stomach. The pain exploded across my gut, and a wave of nausea came over me. She let go of my shoulders and I immediately crumpled to the floor. I whimpered in pain and started coughing, holding my stomach. I was surprised that she managed to knock the wind out of me.

"If I find you acting up one more time…we'll come after you and teach you a lesson…and next time, I won't so easy on you." She turned around and left me there on the ground. Easy? She was going easy on me? That only made me frightened at the thought of Motoko in full combat mode.

I managed to get up, leaning against the wall. I never knew that a punch to the stomach could hurt this bad. Or make me feel this nauseous. But that could've been my nerves. I don't know; it doesn't really matter.

I stood up, took a sharp turn around the corner, and sprinted down the hall as if I was being chased by a maniac. And in some ways…I kind of felt like I was...although no one was following me at the moment. Now there was no hope at all...no one I could turn to for help…

Tears started to overflow from my eyes. I was in constant danger now. They were after me at every corner; ready to strike. I remember I kept thinking, 'Oh god, Mom, help me. What should I do?

I didn't realize where I was running to, but I didn't care. I just wanted to get away from the threats and from the fear. They were coming after me, and there was nothing I could do about it. No use going to someone now; they were everywhere and knew where I would run to for shelter. That is; everywhere except for home and work.

I stopped running long enough to catch my breath. My chest hurt from dashing so suddenly. That's when I become conscious of my surroundings. I had raced all the way home. I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes. I couldn't enter the house looking like this. They would definitely know what was wrong. I slid the door across and cheerfully sang, "I'm home!"

Shigure was at the table, looking over his manuscript. He pushed his spectacles up the bridge of his nose and looked up, smiling.

"Ah, welcome home Tohru. School was good?"

I went to reply positively, but the image of Motoko staring at me with her hateful eyes came back to me in a flash. My stomach pain came back, and I nearly doubled over from the ache.

"Tohru, are you all right?"

I nodded, closing my eyes and gritting my teeth. I took some deep breaths to prevent myself from vomiting right then and there.

"My…my stomach…r-really h-hurts…its nothing-"

But my belly decided to revolt at that moment. My hand flew up to my mouth and I zipped up the stairs before I could give Shigure a chance to answer. I threw my book bag in my room and rushed into the bathroom, closing the door behind me. I knelt down in front of the bowl, opened the lip, and leaned forward, ready to puke. For what I thought was a good five minutes, I emptied the contents from my stomach into the toilet. But afterwards, all that came was dry-heaving. And tears. I couldn't keep my emotions under control. I tried to keep it as discrete as possible, but I was retching rather loud. If we had neighbors, I bet they would've heard me. I gave up trying to hide it once I heard footsteps coming up the stairs.

"Tohru…are you all right in there?"

I struggled to respond, but only heaved again.

"Are you sick?"

I swallowed hard and moaned, "Uh huh"

The door opened and Shigure came in. He knelt down and pulled my hair back. He then massaged my back for a while, until the gagging subsided. We were silent for a little bit, but soon Shigure asked, "Are you okay now?"

I nodded, and slowly got up. My stomach was so sore and I was a bit dizzy. The taste in my mouth was nasty, so I turned on the water and rinsed my mouth out with the liquid. Shigure put his hand on my forehead and stated, "You don't have a fever. Were you feeling like this at school?"

School. The place that I once considered as a refuge was now my prison. I shook my head and explained, "N-no…I just…just felt bad when I was…walking home. I think it's the stress of s-school and work. It's getting to me…t-t-that's all."

I pushed my hair back, making me feel a tad better. But, my stomach still hurt; from the barfing and the blow from Motoko. Like a zombie, I dragged my weary body to my room and collapsed on my bed.

I didn't even want to change into my pajamas. I didn't feel well at all. And it was the tension that was causing my suffering; both mentally and physically.

I sensed Shigure's presence, and his cool, calm voice broke the short silence.

"Do you need anything, Tohru?"

I shook my head. "No…no, I'm all right. I'm just…I'm just r-really tired…and I still don't feel good…"

"Enough said. I'll go get you some Pepto." Shigure told me. I went to object, but my argument got caught in my throat. My eyes flew open once I realized that I needed to cook supper.

"Uh, Shigure, wait!" He stopped in his tracks. "W-what…what do you w-want for dinner?"

He just smiled and told me, "Just get some rest. I'll be right back with the medicine. You're taking a day off from the housekeeping, all right?"

Normally, I would've been against the thought, but I felt so awful that I accepted it, which only made me feel guilty. Shigure left and I struggled to get my pajamas on. I plopped back onto my comfy bed, curled up, and tried to fall asleep, despite my tender stomach torturing me.

I tried to remember what Mom said about all people having a good side. But, it was hard to apply it to this club. They were hateful and bloodthirsty. I just wished it would all end...